Is That Harmless Crush Really So Harmless?

Alright, sit down—let’s have a chat about something that’s been simmering under the surface of marriages everywhere, like a pot of gumbo about to boil over. I’m talking about micro-affairs—you know, those little crushes on someone at work or on social media that seem totally harmless.

“Oh, it’s nothing serious, just a bit of fun!” you might tell yourself. But is it really?

When Innocent Crushes Start to Blur the Lines

Let’s paint the picture.

You’re at work or scrolling through Instagram, and there’s this one person who makes you laugh just a little more than usual, or maybe they’ve got that one special trait your partner doesn’t. It seems harmless, right?

But here’s where the comedy turns into drama:

Every time you find yourself daydreaming about this person, you’re unknowingly making a withdrawal from the emotional bank account of your marriage. And when that account is overdrawn, trust me—things get messy.

“A marriage thrives on emotional deposits. The moment you start investing outside, you’re risking financial—and emotional—bankruptcy.”

The Danger of Emotional Boundaries

Think of emotional boundaries as invisible fences—you don’t always see them, but oh boy, do you feel it when you cross them.

• Sharing your dreams, frustrations, or personal struggles with someone outside your marriage? 🚩

• Finding yourself excited to see or talk to them more than your own partner? 🚩

• Laughing at their jokes more than your spouse’s? 🚩

This is where those “harmless” crushes start to look less like a cute little puppy and more like a stray dog that won’t leave your yard.

Attraction Is Normal—But What You Do With It Matters

Let’s be real: feeling attraction or admiration for others is human nature. That’s not the issue. The issue is how you handle it.

If you’re:

✔️ Giggling over texts from someone who isn’t your spouse

✔️ Finding more excitement in their company than your partner’s

✔️ Emotionally confiding in them more than your spouse

Then you might be inadvertently turning your marriage into the opening act—instead of the main event.

How to Keep Your Marriage the Headline Act

1. Check in With Yourself & Your Partner

Instead of confessing every little crush like it’s some grand revelation, take a moment to reflect:

• Are you still sharing your daily life with your partner?

• Do you still laugh at each other’s silly jokes or are those reserved for someone else?

2. Reinforce Emotional Boundaries

You wouldn’t loan money to a stranger before making sure your own finances are in check, right? The same goes for emotional energy. Keep the best of you for your partner.

3. Reignite the Fun in Your Relationship

If you find yourself emotionally drifting, bring back the spark!

• Spice things up with new experiences together.

• Chase each other around the house naked like you used to. 😆

• Make it a point to flirt with each other, not just outside admiration.

“If you’re spending more time thinking about someone else than your partner, it’s time to refocus your lens.”

Final Thoughts: Keep Your Love Story Center Stage

Strong emotional fences. Real laughter. A heart that stays where it belongs.

Because in the end, the best love stories aren’t the ones where only one person is starring… they’re the ones where you and your partner are in it together, stealing the show.